Saturday, June 04, 2011

Football theory.


I watched the football match between the England and the Switzerland earlier. Favourites England very soon went behind 2 - 0 and were being outplayed and out-cheated (first goal, he never touched him, ref) by the wily Alpine also rans. After 30 minutes, Sig Capello replaced the crocked left back, Ashley Cole, with Everton's Leighton Baines (above) and parity was very soon restored, with Baines, to my mind, being the stand-out player for England.

Why was this? It was for no other reason than because he looks like a proper footballer. Busy and stocky. Wide forehead. Proper haircut. The way footballers used to look back when the Daily Express was very nearly a newspaper. Let's face it, when I was a kid nobody ever wanted to look like a footballer, even though some of them were reported to earn about £100 a week. I bet he even has an old Ford Granada Ghia and wants to run a pub in Cheshire when he hangs up his boots. This is the way it should be.



Some proper footballers, not nancy boy overpaid whingeing poofs (except maybe the long-haired lady-boy in the Arsenal shirt). Huge prizes for correct guesses.

15 Vegetable peelings:

Blogger Tim Footman said...

3 and 4 are Graham Taylor and Charlie George. Thought the second was Norman "Bites Yer Legs" Hunter but now I'm not so sure.

2:35 am  
Blogger Dave said...

I have no idea what this post is about. It's the cricket season.

6:50 am  
Blogger Sharon J said...

I'm pretty sure there were plenty of blokes who would have been happy to look like George Best if it meant having his pulling power.

11:36 am  
Anonymous Zoe said...

Football is all about looks now? That's news to me - and not the way I enjoy watching a good game.

5:41 pm  
Blogger Richard said...

God forbid anyone should want to look like Rio Ferdinand

8:39 pm  
Anonymous MarkG said...

You've been taken in by the sideburns, haven't you?

3:13 pm  
Blogger Richard said...

Yes, it was painful.

Welcome back, Mark.

I'm waiting for Malc to guess the rest, especially No 2. No 3 is indeed an impish Graham Turnip, and No 4 is Golden Boot, Charles George of the Arse and Derby County. Hint: No 1 also a Ram.

8:56 pm  
Anonymous Blazing said...

Alan Durban and Bobby Hope perchance, young Richard.

You could have had a pic of that long haired ladyboy in a Derby shirt with a curly perm. One Frederick Charles George remains a pal, funnily enough.

9:22 pm  
Blogger Richard said...

Mr Saddle wins all the points. By god, I remember that perm. He was good VFM was Charlie and that '71 belt from the 18 yard line remains a vivid memory. I can well remember the football card I had that said "Charlie George is an Arsenal icon" with a cartoon of adoring hordes bowing to a statue. Wish him well.

6:42 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"poofs"?!

What is this - 1972?

Yes - I can see that you and the twat-lover are well-suited...

8:01 pm  
Anonymous voip services said...

I have no idea what this post is about. It's the cricket season.

3:53 am  
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